funny wedding books novel amazon.com Wedding Chronicles Bob N. Boguslavski
I won this book through a giveaway here on GoodReads.

I really wanted to like this book, not only because it seemed interesting, but also because the author spent so much time and efforts to trace it, since it seemed lost, and I really wanted to reward him with a good review.

Unfortunately, I cannot do so. I really tried to enjoy it, but I was not able to understand his purpose in all this. The characters were boring and, honestly, sometimes I even felt disgusted by them. Even though he travelled all around the world and he dealt with many different kind of people, I could feel sometimes prejudices and bigotry, not to talk about the machismo. I think this is a book that only Canadian or American people could read, because they are the only ones that could properly understand it. The main character says the he is not ready to get married, but I think that he is just one of those forever irresolute people, unable to make decisions.

I decided to give it 2 stars because the descriptions of the different lifestyles around the world are very interesting.

The writing style is well-built, but in some parts the author uses so much slang that it is almost impossible to understand him for a non native English speaker like me. However, I will not blame him for this, because I am sure that it was due to my partial knowledge of the language.

I am sorry to write a review like this, but this is not a book I would recommend since it communicate me nothing.

Rating: 2 / 5 *

Original Posting: Fede | December 25, 2014 | Source Link: Goodreads

Subject: Tenerife #18 - What's in your glass?
(Posted on Jun 10, 2014 at 05:02PM )
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Perplexed by that ages-old glass that is half-full versus half-empty conundrum? Decisions, decisions.


It always depends on how you wanna look at stuff, ain't it? Optimsim and pessimism are just states of mind. Attitude is what counts.


Just as Dudley Steele scolded Billy Brant and "Student" Grant Lipman pooside at the villa in Tenerife, the day after his bachelor bash dished him a raging hangover, always ask your friendly neighborhood barkeep to pour you another one. Unless your're getting bad pours, that should usually fix it.


And if/when the beer runs out, switch to something else.


Whether your thinking runs left, right, middle of the road, or upside down, it doesn't matter. There's always an answer for that too, even if you're a more cerebral science- and math-minded type.


And as our good friend and drinking buddy, The Most Optimistic Man in the World, always has a pository spin on things, here is an apropos vignette on a matter of note sure to make a splash in our world at some point down the road.


Remember, as Bobby Bo likes to always say as a rule in life:

Think Pository = Negatory Suppository

At the end of the day, forget all that pseudo-intellectual philosophical crap, and just shout "Uno mas!" When the beer runs out, no whine, switch to wine, shots or whatever else may be lying around. It's all perspective.

And when you tire of this talk of glasses in various states of relative fill, maybe "Think green" and go smoke some weed or sumpin' for yet another different take.

Subject: Westport #94 - Whaddup with Whiskey vs. Whisky?
(Posted on Jun 4, 2014 at 10:34PM )
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So what is it all about when you see that word spelled both ways, with or without 'e' in there? Supposedly a logic to it all drives that, but it is not always adhered to it seems. Go figure. Kinda like with a lot of things in the world.

As mentioned in the book, it is dependent on where the drink comes from, but many times, in practice, folks just spell it the way they want, based on what part of the world they are from. This includes writers and copy editors alike.

First, here's the Wikpedia skinny of what a whisky / whiskey is, to begin with. As for 'correct' spelling, there seems to have been a rethink on this the last few years though. This fine piece on The Kitchn goes into good detail on the whole matter, and settles on the following rule (going by country of origin, and what is on the bottle label):

- E in country name (e.g., United States / America and Ireland), then spell it whiskey,
and the plural as whiskeys.

- No e in country name (e.g., Canada, Scotland, Japan, Australia, Finland, and India),
then spell it whisky, and the plural as whiskies.

Note how the dueling plural forms of the word can further bamboozle folks. Overall though, Bob digs this simple rule and it makes complete sense by what it says on the bottle.

But then, Germany, England, and Wales had to come along and $%@* that up and spell it whisky nonetheless with their own products. So much for what makes sense in the world.


When using the term generically, go ahead and write it anyway you want, depending on where you are in the world, and your audience, as long as you are consistent. The venerable NY Times Dining column used to try and do that per here through late 2008, but then seems to have capitulated to the newer thinking here in early 2009. Hey, shit happens. Deal with it and move on is the motto to follow.

These older chaps below, earlier on, went and messed the spelling up with their rendition of the word as whuskey in song.

Red Ingle and the Natural Seven singing "Cigareetes, Whuskey, and Wild, Wild, Women" (1948)
The Muppet Show (special guest Peter Sellers), season 2, episode 18, original airing Feb. 25, 1978

Words of wisdom for the ages, unless you want to nail the trifecta, pardon the pun. There are many versions of this song, but the two here were mentioned in the book, in my conversation with Pops di Tomaso and his favorite rendition. There was no debate either back then about whether it was whuskey or whusky. That was for wussies, no doubt.

As for any other countries making the spirit that may or may not adhere to that rule, you can check that out, one by one, on Malt Madness if you have mucho mas time on your hands, and looking for something new to sip on.

A place like Thailand and its whiskies adhere to the spelling rule, but those tipples are not actually officially deemed a whisky to begin with, per this 2011 Intoxicated Abroad posting and the Wiki definition above. BNB very much digs our main man Matt's slogan, "Life's too short to be sober at home." It's way better to be some single guy abroad, be it at weddings, or on other (mis)adventures cum vacations.

Like many things in life, best not to think about stuff too much, and just go friggin' do it. And then, I suppose as long as the bartender knows what to pour, then you are golden. I end this post with a nifty little infographic on whisk(e)y to mull while sippin' sumpin' smoooooove.


Cheers, and bottoms up, Bobbolin(o/a)!

So what was that drink that took out Dr. LoveSexy the night before the wedding in Jordan, and gave him a big hangover the next day?

Arak is a well-known, anise-flavored spirit distilled from grapes that is consumed all over the Middle East. It is usually accompanied with food, just as it was with the fine open-air mezze dinner on the shores of the Dead Sea. The drink does a great job of clearing the palate, even better than wine.


A lot more on how it is made can be found here in this Wiki piece. This Economist article from 2003 goes on about the history of the drink, the Arab invention of distillation, and other drinks related to Levantine arak like pastis, ouzo, sambuca, raki, mastika, and absinthe, and others. Note the arak in the Middle East, should not be confused with the drink of similar name arrack (and sometimes even the same spelling) in South East Asia that is NOT related at all, has no anise in it, and is coconut, sugarcane, or grain derived.

The process by which this clear spirit turns cloudy white when it is mixed with water is called louching. Basically, the anise oil which is colorless in the alcohol, emulsifies when the water is added, and presto, the drink transforms to its milky color as this short video shows.


Arak is usually served in a shorter glass with some ice already in it, and mixed with water thereafter, in a 1:2 ratio.


Maybe it wasn't just the arak that knocked things out of the box for Dr. LoveSexy, but perhaps the combination of beer, sucking on the hookah / shisha pipe, and any other alcohol that, collectively in combination, may have been the culprit for his hangover the next day and putting him in need of some serious greasy food as a cure. In any event, right or wrong, as a scapegoat perhaps, Bob claimed that "Haddad haddid him in."

The brand being consumed by all that night was Haddad, a local Jordanian brand made by Eagle Distilleries Co. that was established in 1953, and one of the first companies in the country (number three actually) licensed to manufacture alcohol.


When you're some single guy hitting weddings all over the world, it pays to be open, flexible and chillaxed about the food and drink going down around you. It's all part of the fun and experience of different cultures and traditions.

In any event, no matter where you are, or what you are drinking, it's all about the "Cheers!" or fe sahetek / fi sahitak in Arabic [say Figh sa hee' tik], or literally "to your health." This handy table lists the greeting in 60 languages.



Some things in life, you don't need to necessarily experience to know enough to stay away from altogether, like, erhm, say sumpin' like anal electrocution.

Illustration Credit: Bobbissimo

Or when someone who has been there already with some life experience,usually suffering for it, and offers up some deep and heartfelt advice. One needs to remember that stuff for future reference. You just know from the way they said it, that they have lived it, and it's sooooo true. Those kernels of wisdom doled out from time to time most certainly apply to marriage. Stay alert and focused to pick up on these gems when they come across your radar.

Way back when, when Bob was a teen, he got some of that type of insight from Lulu as recounted in the book, when Bob asked him what it was like to be married 42 years. Tough to follow and fathom when you've just turned 18 at the time, and he's 63. His reply was short (at only six words total, and two words were each used twice to boot, for added effect). Bob's still ain't no closer to getting married after all these years, but he knows that Lulu's words ring really true. Lulu had it going on, when it came to life lessons like that.

Here are a few more tips for all the married fellas out there, on how to navigate those perilous waters with longterm success. Learn from your other shackled comrades in arms and their past faux pas and serious speed bumps they have experienced along the way. We guys can all learn!

This guy knows what he's doing for sure in this sweet little clip, and it all sounds so much better and credible with a posh British accent.


Then there's the scoop on all the poop when a guy is thrown into the proverbial doghouse by da Boss in his life for having a crack moment or brief lack of focus with disastrous consequences.


Tim Hawkins has a fine singing version chocka blocka of good advice for all the married fellas out there.


There are always those simple but highly effective tips humanity can borrow from the animal kingdom. This one is a classic around out there on the Web for several years now in various locations, but it still presses home the message effectively.

SINGLE


MARRIAGE


DIVORCE


MARITAL BLISS

So, at the end of the day, why would any (soon-to-be) married guy listen to all this marriage knowledge / experience coming from some still-single guy who has spent a lot of his time, effort and $$$ going to weddings all around the world? Well, as the ever-astute Dr. LoveSexy once said, "Yo, I ain't had no safe fall on my head yet either, but I know it would hurt."

You can bank on that for sure.




Subject: Montreal #12 - Hockey, Politics + Language
(Posted on May 7, 2014 at 11:11PM )
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Two things that haven't changed with Bob's hometown since childhood, have been the city's devoted following of les Habs / Canadiens (especially now that they're in the second round of the playoffs battling it out with the Beantown Bruins, another place he knows well) and provincial level politics with its discussion / debate around Quebec's (potential) separation from the rest of Canuckistan.

It was the case when Bob was a kid, and again at the time of the opening wedding of the novel back in 1987, and just as true today decades later. The talk of an independent Quebec may be quiet now for a couple years given the election outcome a month ago today, but it will be back again no doubt one day. It just sort of seems to take a break every now and again, to regroup and rear its head once more. But both topics can always be a good excuse for a sprited discussion at a wedding, or any other event for that matter

Bob might be out of Quebec a long time now, and cross-polinated (or polluted, if you prefer), by many other countries and cultures, but on the plus side, he can still get a fix of maple syrup, poutine, and a smoked meat sandwich as needed, but not necessarily all at the same time though (which you really won't be getting at any wedding), and he certainly doesn't miss winters out East in Montreal anymore either.


Then there's one of his local flavor favorites on the humor side that has emerged in Têtes à claques (TaC), which has been around now since August 2006. It was all originally in French (still the best version by far if you can understand the language), but there are quite a few sketches that have been translated into English and Spanish too. However, for full effect, one can't beat the original ones for their authentic local Québecois accent, which bemuses many folks in France and other countries in the French-speaking world.

Here's one TaC sketch in French with English subtitles, so those that don't speak the language can pick up on the local Quebec French accent and still follow along otherwise.


This cat Obsesik does a good job on breaking down the difference between how French speakers in Quebec and France sound like when speaking English.


And this gal Julie Supastar doles out a good basic primer on how to speak some of the more important local French words in Quebec, handy for any tourist or Bruins visit to Montreal and La Belle Province, be it for a wedding, hockey game, or otherwise. Just generally useful everyday French 101 stuff going on here.


And as regards the outcome of the current Montreal - Boston NHL series, kinda just like with the fate of marriage longterm, as they say in Spanish, "vamos a ver lo que pasa," or we'll see what happens. Bob ain't got no crystal ball or nothing, since he's just some single bozo bumpkin attending weddings all over the place. C'est beau, c'est bon.

Hilarious, clever and unique!

A hilarious and well written read. Through the life milestone of a series of weddings, Bob Boguslavski, the colourful narrator, takes us on a journey through time and culture, immersing us in the climate of each of his settings. Through his interactions, beginning when he is young, Bob introduces us to a group of lively characters, friends and guests, and these people affect and reflect the man we come to know.

We get to eavesdrop on Bob's conversations as he cleverly and lightly pokes fun at the concept of marriage and provides insightful social commentary. We have all been to weddings. Boguslavski gives us a new and unique perspective. His witty, gritty, and direct style will appeal to both men and women. Read this book. You will laugh yourself silly. Bob is not yet ready to settle down. I look forward to hearing more from him.

Rating: 5 / 5 *

Original Posting: Ben11222 | April 06, 2014 | Source Link: Apple iBooks (CA)
I really wanted to like this book because the author provided it to me for free and was very nice about it, but I just found it painfully boring. It was trying to be a sort of sociological look into weddings in different cultures, but it didn't really provide any insight into those cultures, it just showed you dull conversations that happened to occur at those weddings. It was also trying to tell some interesting wedding related stories, and it failed at doing that too.

I also got really annoyed by the borderline asinine level of detail provided about each wedding that the author couldn't possibly have remembered (exact number of guests, as an example) and which no one cares about anyway. He references people that you don't know as if you do, and generally just writes way, WAY too much. There's potential for the book to be decent if it were tightened up a LOT, but until about 50% is cut out, it's just too clunky. I couldn't finish it.

Rating: 1 / 5 *

Original Posting: Arielle | April 01, 2014 | Source Link: Goodreads
Life Jim,...

I laughed, sniggered, argued, farted in your general direction-eh Bob, zoned out, zoomed in, remembered, relived and connected my various wedding trips. Boguslavski hits nails on heads, goes off on wild tangents, produces more off-the-wall alliterations than Will.I.am and a soundtrack to suit your ever changing mood.

Rating; 4 / 5 *

Original Posting: Maurice van Sabben | March 16, 2014 | Source Link: Apple iBooks (UK)